Stay still

Well my brain is just full and has been for the past week. Hold on a second - maybe I can get some of it decluttered: sdlfkjxckfjslijrweijapoijqlkjclijdfl dlkfjs dlkje iqproi jdfksdl;miopwje rfjskdlfkmx kofpsejf sldkfmcklw jeips dkflwpefois jdfkwope fjsdklvncxghopeirt jiwkfnsdoifj w;eot.

Eh, that only made it slightly better. Made me laugh anyways.

My beautiful friend Marissa said to me last night, "God provided a job for you to save up money for Slovakia." So yes, even though I didn't raise a ton, God still provided.

Tonight at bible study Matt talked about Joseph's story in Genesis. Through the ups and downs of his life and his story (13 years in jail for something he didn't do!), God was still with him and still rose him to a powerful position that would help tons of people out through a famine. Sometimes what we go through may not be specifically for us, but for someone else too. While Joseph was in a powerful position, he was also helping a lot of people. And as Genesis said, what they meant for harm, God used for good.

We also ended up talking about praying for others during our small group time. I hate hate hate washing dishes for 2-4 hours at Starbucks on some days. The heat of the washing machine pours out into the room, my rubber gloves keep my hands clean but I have to take them off to scratch my face or whatever, and overall it is boring and frustrating. But in those times I've tried to pray. Not just for myself, but for others. Sometimes for an entire hour. While it's easy to pray for those I love and my friends and family, it is more difficult to pray for people who make me mad or hurt me. But I do it.

Something that has helped me immensely over the past year is to constantly write or think in my head about what I'm thankful for. When times are good, I thank God for it and remember not to take it for granted. And when things are going bad, thinking / writing what I'm thankful for reminds me that there is still good in a bad situation and that we are still to praise Him through it.

I'm leaving for the beach on Saturday - going to St. George Island, FL. It will be a 7 hour drive. :-( But it will be a great trip!

Today I went to Blue Ridge, GA with my friend Joy. We went to shops, had lunch, etc. It was a fun day trip. There is so much to do in life... why always go to the same places or stay in the same area? I don't want to pay a ton to do expensive stuff, but it is fun to go different places. Joy is my friend who goes on adventures with me. Although I'd go with other people too. Sometimes it's just hard to match up schedules with people.

Slovakia has obviously been on my mind a lot. I don't want to go in with expectations. I want to go in with an open mind and an open heart.

One thing I am hearing God say is, "STAY STILL." There are definite times in life when I feel the need to do something because I feel like I'm tired of waiting. I either run away or run forward. In high school I was one of the youth leaders who helped make decisions and plan things, in 12th grade I helped teach and direct the freshman chorus class in school, I taught middle and high school girls at church when I was in college, I have a degree to be a teacher, and through all of that I have been taught how to be a leader. So sometimes when I feel the need to lead but I know God is telling me not to, I don't want to just sit still, I get frustrated and want to just say, "Never mind God. Just forget it. I don't to wait or deal with it, I just want to forget about it and ignore it." But I hear God saying, "No, I'm not asking you to run the other way. I'm asking you to just wait for Me to act. It's just not time yet. Don't stress, I got it." Ok. Waiting. Staying put. I hope God has some cool elevator music to play while I'm waiting. :-)