Outline for my life story that I will someday write

1988: born in Charolotte, NC.
1989: Uhhh, I turned 1.
1990: My parents and I moved to Columbus, GA where my dad pastored at a church called Morning Side Presbyterian Church
1991: I turned 3 and started going to a private Christian school called Westminster Christian School. My K-3 teacher's name was Mrs. Howard.
1992: My brother Chris was born. My K-4 teacher's name was Mrs. Daniels.
1993: I was in Kindergarten and I remember so much about it! Probably more than most people and I have no idea why I remember SO much detail about my life.

1994: I changed schools and started first grade at Dobule Churches Elementary school. I didn't really make any friends and remember that we had two teachers and one was really mean.

1995: We moved in February of my first grade year to Acworth, GA where we currently live. My dad became the pastor at Mars Hill Presbyterian Church. I started at Shelton Elementary and loved it! Since I was the new kid, everybody wanted to show me around and be my friend. I still keep in touch with people from elementary school. 2nd grade started and I got in trouble a lot for talking too much. I met my best friend Sara Volkodav in 2nd grade, the kind of friend where we spent all birthdays together, spent the night at each other's houses, bought the same clothes to wear on the same day, and more. I discovered my love for writing during 2nd grade through writing in a journal at school and typing stories on the computer.

1996: I got the chicken pox for my 8th birthday, and gave it to my dad who was 36 and brother who was 4. I continued to love everything about elementary school! I still keep in touch with my 3rd grade teacher - I helped out in her class during college and have had lunch with her several times. I got glasses this year.

1997: 4th grade - great year. I loved my teacher, my friends, and family.

1998: In February of 4th grade, I helped out in a 2nd grade class while my class went on a field trip I didn't want to go to (Fernbank Museum) because I'd been before. I was the teacher's helper and LOVED it! That is when I decided to be a teacher. I wasn't taken seriously about it until high school when I planned out my 4 years with classes geared for teaching. As I started 5th grade, Chris started Kindergarten. I loved 5th grade as well.

1999: I cried so much at the end of 5th grade! I was sad to leave my teachers and all that elementary school was! 6th grade started and I became incredibly shy and quiet... and insanely dorky. And I mean the definition of dorky - in my looks, my clothes, and all that I did. My best friend Sara and I began to drift and that was sad. I started going to middle school youth group, and that was my favorite part about life.

2000: Who knew middle school could be so scaring? In all 3 years of middle school I got made fun of so much, I had no friends at school, and I'm pretty sure I had depression. I was always sad, overdramatic, and socially awkward. I'm so thankful to two of my 7th grade teachers who were beautiful and all the students loved them, because they were both Christians and encouraged me and loved me despite how weird I was! I've also kept in touch with them since then and have lunch with them about once a year and talk on facebook. Youth group was great still, and one of the youth leaders, Garet, was my role model and meant the world to me. She was 28 at the time. I stuck to her like glue. She took me out places and invited me to play games at her house. I got contacts this year. I started singing in the adult praise team this year.

2001: 8th grade proved to be just as bad as the other two years. However, I droped band after two years of playing the clarinet and started chorus. Although I still had no friends at school, my 8th grade chorus teacher was so great and encouraging and I also still keep in touch with her. She actually made my cupcakes for my college graduation party because she makes such cool cupcakes!

2002: I dreaded high school simply because the last change had been so bad and high school just  seemed scary. But 9th grade started without my permission! I was still painfully shy and quiet. I hated 9th grade because PE was hard, my spanish teacher was mean and I didn't like spanish, I was failing Algebra so I had to get a tutor, and although I liked honors lit it was also hard and based on a lot of conversations in class... where I was too shy to participate in. I still had no friends at school, and youth group had a lot of drama in it. I skipped over Beginners Chorus (because my 8th grade chorus teacher told her to push me ahead) and went to a women's chorus, so being the only freshman was actually fun.

2003: At the end of 9th grade, Garet and her husband David moved an hour and a half away, but stopped coming to our church and I stopped seeing her. I cried so much! When 10th grade started, I decided I had to get over being shy. I literally wrote down lists of things to say to people around me and forced conversations. I met a group of girls amongst my classes who became my best friends from 10th-12th grade. Most of them were strong Christian girls and most of us were in the same chorus class. I got an amazing set of teachers that could not have been any better. FCA was great and many of them were so nice to me. I still wasn't a fan of youth group, so I went to other youth groups that my friends went to, which was controverisal since my dad was the pastor.

2004: I made All-State chorus at the end of my 10th grade year where I was the only one in the school to make it and go to Savannah, GA with my chorus teacher. My chorus teacher, Michelle Lokhorst, was an amazing person for my 4 years of high school. She was a Christian as well, and I baby-sat her two sweet kids starting in 10th grade. I had a blast hanging out with her in Savannah. I got my driver's licence in May since I turned 16. My youth pastor from 6th grade up until that point took a job as a chaplin in the air force to travel the world. I was devistated along with the rest of our youth group. He made such a huge impact on us all. I still didn't want to go to youth group because of the people in it. 11th grade started and I had three of the same teachers from 10th grade! I was stoked! I went to a million 16th birthday parties and loved all my friends.

2005: 11th grade was also an amazing year of high school. Chorus was a major part of my time in high school. I sang the National Anthem all 4 years at graduation, even though it was usually just for seniors to sing. I was in a trio that competed in the region from 10th-12th grade. I a song or two on the piano for our chorus concerts. I sang in the talent shows each May. My 12th grade year I had extra electives available, so I chose to help in the freshman chorus class! I got to teach them along side Michelle, and played piano for their concerts or directed. I had great teachers in 12th grade too. I got my first car that summer so that I could drive to school for my 12th grade year which was so great because I hated the bus! We had adults step in to help out with youth group from 2004-2005, but in May of 2005 we got a new youth pastor named Michael. He had never been a youth pastor before, so when he started he was full of energy, new ideas, and everyone was so excited about the changes. I worked at Firehouse Subs -loved the food, hated the job.

2006: Youth group was so important to me my 12th grade year. I learned so much and grew so much. I was on the youth leader team and helped plan things and reach out to the others in youth group. I went to every event we had, and all the trips we had. Finishing high school was so hard because I loved the teachers and friends I had, and had become so content with youth group. I didn't get into the college I wanted to, so went to Kennesaw State instead. I lived at home and drove 30 minutes to and from each day. I didn't particularly like college. There was no young adults group at church and I was too old for youth group, and I didn't fit in with my mom's sunday school, so I looked for a new church. What a terrible process that is! I quit Firehouse in May and decided to not work the first semester of college. I stopped singing in the adult praise team at church. I played piano that Christmas for money at my high school chorus concert since I was out of high school.

2007: I went to Northwest Christian Church in January of that year just because it was down the road from my house and the music was good. The young adults group was small but at least there was one. I continuted looking for a church, but decided to go every other week to this church, and in May decided that's where I'd go. I asked the youth pastor if I could help out and he gave me a small group of 6th grade girls that met on Sunday nights after the main part of youth group. College...? It's all a blur, but I know that I hated homework, wasn't interested in any of the core classes, and made surface level friends in each class, but no deep friendships. I worked as a receptionist at a security company off Delk Road for 6 months but hated driving home at 5 PM each night in rush hour traffic for an hour. I went to Kenya for the first time that summer with my home church, Mars Hill, and LOVED IT! It changed my life. I started working as a teacher's assitant at the Sylvan Learning Center that fall. I played piano for my first wedding that year.

2008: I was lacking in friends again. After each class each semester, I just didn't see them anymore. In the summer of that year, I moved out and rented a 3 bedroom house with one other girl from church. She was 3 years older than me and in her 2nd year of teaching 2nd grade. It was expensive. But it was such a cute little house and I loved living on my own! I quit Sylan in May because it wasn't enough hours / money. I baby-sat full time that summer, as I had other summers. I started working at Lifeway Christian bookstore in August of that year. The young adults group at church was ok. The leader, Todd, was so great, but it was just a mishmash of people in it that I didn't really connect with. I helped with 6th grade girls again starting in the fall.

2009: I went to Kenya again that summer and loved it just as much as the first time. I don't know when I started education classes, but somewhere around this time. It was harder than you'd think. I quit Lifeway in October and began baby-sitting full time. I still loved my house. Still no deep friendships. I taught high school girls (all 4 ages) starting that year.

2010: My roomate got engaged in March and they got married in July, so we finished renting the house and I moved home because I was broke as all getout, and I knew that I wouldn't have a job for the next year due to student teaching. I should have graduated that May, but long story short, I didn't. I started part time student teaching plus classes that fall and it was time consuming. During that summer I had lunch with Travis who I worked with at Lifeway and he told me about his first mission trip to Slovakia. He said he loved the bible study he went to through Northstar and invited me to come. I started going- we met at the Bartons' house, a family who leads it. There's about 40 young adults from 18-35 and that was what I'd been searching for for 4 years. It was such an answer to prayer. I continued going to the bible study at Northwest though, so I went to two. I stopped helping with the youth because of my busy schedule.

2011: Student teaching wore me out in every aspect!! I had great teachers helping me, but I felt so stressed and frustrated and inadaquate. I did not enjoy it overall. I graduted college (finally) at the same time Chris graduated high school. I got a summer internship with Primrose Corporate over the summer, the first time I worked 40+ hours with a good hourly pay. I couldn't find a teaching job and Primrose couldn't afford to keep me at the end of the summer, nor could I ever move up in the company without teaching first. I looked for a new job for 4 months before finding Starbucks. I felt so defeated and mad that I was back to minimum wage after graduating college, and no where near my degree. Another year of going to two bible studies but conneting more with Northstar's bible study. Lots of hang outs, deep conversations, and laughter. I sang in my friend's wedding, my first wedding I sang in.

2012: I had wanted to go back to Kenya this year but after praying about it I decided in January to go to Slovakia! I started going to Northstar on the Sundays we had meetings and loved going. Soon I was between two churches, and not serving at either. I finally decided to go to Northstar and will start teaching one of the high school girl group on Sunday mornings starting some time in August! I went to Slovakia and it was great, but also look forward to going back to Kenya when God allows me to. I am so thankful for the friends he's given me in my life for the past two years. I wish I could move out, but need to save money until I have a better paying job. I'm still looking for a "real" job, and couldn't find a teaching job for this fall either. I miss singing since I haven't done much of it for the past 5 years and it was such a BIG part of my life for a while.

Slovakia: Love, Beauty, All-Encompasing, and A Reminder

Ah, Slovakia.

I shared this with my bible study group last night in my brief recap of the trip. Before going on the mission trip, our group leader Brad asked our smaller team what love language we best recieved and best gave out. While I knew I best recieved quality time and phsyical touch, I sat and thought about what I best gave out. Then I realized it was all of them, all the time! And that made sense right then, how that is too much for some people and some people don't like it or don't get it! It's not forced from me, it's just how I've always been. If we're good friends, then I am going to hug you, buy you things, do things for you, write you notes / on facebook, and want to spend time with you. So even when that begins to come across to people who aren't Christians, they start to kind of back away or be confused.

Well on this trip, as with any mission trips, you're both giving and recieving all 5 love languages ALL THE TIME! The camp is set up so that you can write each other notes to put in envelopes, you spend lots of time together, you talk about things, you share your food, buy each other ice cream, give each other things you made in crafts or bracelets, and more. It's tons and tons of love! Then you come home, and it all stops. Sometimes I don't know how to love the difficult people in my life, or the everyday people in my life. And obviously it's different when you're not able to recieve as much as you give out sometimes. There you give of yourself mentally, physically, spiritually, and emotionally, as much as you can and it's a mix between hard and great. Back home while it's less of all of that, it's still hard because you know you're supposed to be more like that in order to love the way we're supposed to.

I had four 15 year old girls in my room for the week of camp, and a 19 year old Slovak leader, Mat'a, who also spoke fluent english. They were such awesome girls. They are currently my facebook cover. :-) It was hard sometimes when we couldn't communicate well. It was also hard to listen to them at night speaking fluent Slovak for 30 minutes to an hour, especially when they would all laugh or cry and I didn't know why and wanted to give them words of encouragement or advice. But during that time I prayed for Mat'a to have the right words to say, and that was all I could do. I did have some great conversations with some of the girls in the camp, in my room or not in my room, and while I didn't personally see any big changes or desicions, I hope that God uses our conversations to plant seeds in their hearts.

The other 5 people on my team who were from America were awesome too. Such a blessing in my life, and just the best people I could have gone with. I am so thankful to see them here, some every week.

The trip in a brief summary: We missed our layover in London because our plane was late, so we got a day to look around London. It's a place I never thought I'd see! It was stressful with 21 of us though. We had a day in Prague which was also beautiful and stressful at the same time. There were tons of trains, subways and buses in all our traveling. I've never sweat as much in my entire life as I did on this trip! Sometimes our camping backpack was on our backs and my book bag on my front, and it was heavy as we walked! At camp we had English classes - my class was great, so well  behaved, so ready to learn. We played games, had crafts, had speakers who told the story of the Prodigal son and some shared their testimonies, there were discussion groups, and each night was a different theme. On night was had one of their foods over the camp fire (sausage, bacon, and onion on a stick over the fire, then put on bread), smores, casino night, mexican night, and a night of worship. Traveling home was 31 hours straight of a bus and planes and cars, and I slept on and off the entire time, throwing off my sleeping schedule!

One of the girls in my room asked me one night why I came to Slovakia. I told her it was because God is the most important thing to me, and Jesus said to go into all the nations and tell others about Him and to love others and serve others, and that I would go wherever I could to do that. Coming back from this trip reminds me that it was a beautiful two weeks, but I am also called to do all of that here in my life now and every day. God is still here as much as He is there. There are people here who need to know God as much as in Slovakia or in Kenya. I just don't know what that looks like. It's a process. I know that the pain of coming back can't be quenched by being busy, reading good books, watching tv, or sleeping. It is only by bringing my heart to God and letting Him bring me peace that I will be able to feel ok again and find ways to serve with as much joy here as I did there.

Last night one of the girls in our group, Hannah Bickers, said that she wants to find something here that she can find just as much connection with and longing for. I totally agree. So whether you went to Slovakia or any other mission trip this summer or not, you still have the great opportunity to live out that same mission here.