It's time

Joshua told the people, "Consecrate yourself, for tomorrow the Lord will do amazing things among you." - Joshua 3:5 (NIV)

Purify yourself - NLT 

Sanctify yourself - NKJV and AMP

In early August, my pastor preached on this and it was a one-week sidestep from our year long series in Genesis. I felt God say that this one applied to me. (In a very specific way that I'm just not writing here.) Multiple other things confirmed it, in ways that only God can. It called upon something I heard God say 7 years ago that has yet to be fulfilled. Over the years I have just stopped praying about it because it's just been so long, and all circumstances point away from what He said. I know that doesn't negate what He said, but I just couldn't hold that promise in my heart anymore because it was just too heavy. Years pass without any sign of it happening. 

But I said ok, let me just start to prepare and sanctify myself as best as I can, and we'll see how it goes. Some days I feel like all of the signs in the world are pointing to it. Let's go. And then there are weeks of nothing, of normal days. However, I'm hopeful again. 

It feels like 7 years ago I got an invitation to a party, and I was excited about it. I showed up, and nobody else did. The room was empty and bare. I kept coming back, and every time I did, no one was there. I asked God if other people got their invitations, and if they did, why weren't they there? I don't know. But He kept telling me there's going to be this amazing party. I eventually stopped checking in to see if anyone showed up. I never threw away the invitation, I just packed it away in a box in a place I never see it. It's dusty and faded from the sun. 

And then He said to me "Ok, it's time." And He wants me to decorate the room for the party, and get food and buy a party dress. I feel like I'm going to do all of this to let it sit in an empty room again. But I got out the invitation and have started the process. 

I hope that some day this will be a story of hope and God's promises to share with lots of people. Until then, I'm showing up again. I'm getting ready. 

A whirlwind

I had a major surgery on my tailbone at the beginning of May. I went to a specialist doctor 6 hours away. The whole thing was miserable. I'm almost at 11 weeks past the surgery and I still have painful days. But I'm doing better. 

I FINALLY MOVED. I'm renting a townhouse 20 minutes from my previous home, slightly closer to work. It's two bedrooms so one is my office! It also has a good sized loft area in the hallway, so that is my prayer loft, as well as just where I sit to read and write and plan out my days. Some good things about the place is that I have a garage, and I don't have to take my groceries up and down stairs to get it into the kitchen. Previously I only parked my car in the garage for a few months in the winter and my dad parked in the driveway, and I had a set of stairs to take up all of my groceries. My laundry is next to my bedroom now, whereas before it was in the basement and my room was on the 2nd floor. It's good to have a desk with two monitors and a good chair to sit in for my two days working from home, whereas previously I was sitting on my bed or on a chair with my laptop on my bed, and sometimes standing with a portable standing part for my computer on my bed. It's been nice to have a few friends over so far, and more to come. 

Moving itself though was a pain. It was my last time asking friends to help me move since it was just boxes and my bed and two bookshelves, because I had to buy all of my furniture and house stuff after I moved in. So the next time I move I'll have a lot more to pack, but also bigger furniture that will need a real moving truck. I had a lot of boxes to unpack, but also a lot of the stuff I bought was online and boxes upon boxes came, so I had boxes sitting around forever that I couldn't fit in my car, and it was driving me insane. I finally got a junk removal place to come get all of the boxes, and although it was expensive, it was worth it. Putting together all of the furniture has been awful. I've had some great friends, and my mom, come help me build some of it, and the other things I've built by myself. Literally everything says to nail the furniture into the wall so it doesn't fall over and kill you, and I'm not nailing all of my furniture to the wall in a rental. Also, IKEA furniture sucks. No seriously. They don't label things, they put ALL of the screws and tiny pieces in one bag, there are too many tiny pieces, and it's confusing and stupid. 

I've been moved in for 6 weeks and it's been hard not having routines and rhythms to my days. Not knowing exactly where I should put things like my shoes, my purse, my work laptop... not being good at going to bed on time, trying to figure out the right temperature for the house because the upstairs stays a whole lot warmer than the downstairs... 

I bought a PS5 and played Hogwarts Legacy - it was great! I went to Islands of Adventure and Universal Studios at the end of April and saw Harry Potter world for the first time, and it was as great as I had hoped it would be, and I don't even ride rides! The whole place was immersive, creative, and the frozen butterbeer was better than I thought it would be. I tried to replicate it when I got home from some recipes online and it was nowhere near it. 

I've been at my "new" church now for a year! I've been in the same bible study for the past year too, with some people coming and going but a lot the same. It's been great. It's funny because a lot of the staff come from bigger churches and keep calling our church a "small" church, but to me it's pretty big because the ones I've been to before were smaller. It's actually hard for me to go to a church where I don't know most of the people in the room. I couldn't begin to tell who is new or who has been there as long as me, besides the handful of people I do know. However, it's still good. 

I am thankful. 

Fancy, fun, and friendships!

Soon I get to take my first "business trip" for work, to work at a symposium (not a conference) at a resort (not a hotel) in Florida. I feel so fancy. I've never stayed in a resort. After it's over, I'm taking a vacation day to go to Islands of Adventure and see Harry Potter World with a friend! I'm so pumped because it's been on my bucket list to go to HP world, and no one I know could ever go with me. Since HP world is split between Islands of Adventure and Universal Studios I do have the day pass to skip between the two, but honestly I don't care about Universal Studios. I went to Islands of Adventure when I was 13 and 15 with my youth group, but HP world didn't exist then. I took a few pictures on my disposable camera that turned out terrible, so it'll be nostalgic for me to go back and also nice to be able to take more pictures! I'll be staying two nights in a hotel near there that is themed like the beach which will also be fun, and we're going to Disney Springs for the first time as well. On a scale from 1-10 of excitement, I'm at a 10. 

I am also on the brink of moving. Still. For the past 3 years. But this time for real. I wish I could say I was about to buy a house but I still can't afford it, so I'll be renting for the time being. But I am still hopeful for good things. It won't be a far move since I'm still at my same job.  

This past August I started going to another new church. My previous one was 45 minutes away, and I just wasn't meshing with people. It just wasn't what I was looking for. The one I've been at since August is GREAT! It's definitely more my style, I've already had meals and coffee with lots of people, and am going on the second semester of a bible study with the same people that are awesome. I've even had dinner with the pastor and his wife, which in previous churches they were too busy to do even after years. 

In October my brother is getting married, so I'll be going to Texas for the first time! We'll be staying in little one room cabins on a property they're getting married in, and I'll have my own. 

I've been at my work for 4 years now and I'm immensely grateful. 

Other things that have been occupying my time these days are listening to the Pod Meets World podcast (Boy Meets World!), reading a million books, watching The Chosen (go watch it right now if you haven't), watching Boy Meets World for the first time, playing Disney Dreamlight Valley on my PC (I can't play Hogwarts Legacy until I get a better PC because my laptop won't run it), going to two bible studies (one with my church and one that I've been to for 11 years), coffee shop hopping, photography, and time with friends. Overall, things in life are good.