A few posts ago I wrote about how sometimes your greatest strengths are also your greatest weaknessess, and said how one example of mine is that I have a huge heart and keep in touch with people well, but on the flip side I'm bad at goodbyes and letting go of people.
Well, another one for me....
I've always enjoyed computer related things. When I was young I played a lot of computer games, and as the internet came along and we got it at home when I was about 10, I continued to learn more about it. Commputer games I used to play: Barbie, American Girl, JumpStart Learning Games, Nancy Drew, The Sims (1, 2, and 3), and more. Then came social networking. Xanga (like a blog), Myspace, Facebook. I've always enjoyed helping people do stuff on the computer like when they're stuck on something and I can show them how to do it. I took a computer class my senior year that taught us about Microsoft Excell, and other programs.
Now I am helping do things for Kenya through my church - helping update / re-do the website for Kenya, put together spreadsheets on Excell, do things with pictures such as powerpoints, uploading them onto snapfish, etc. I love to do all these things! It helps with teaching related things as well, when I'm able to make graphs, find learning games online, etc.
I like to create. Websites, blogs, things related to pictures, videos, etc. It is fun. I learn it quickly. It's been helpful in school projects, in getting lesson plans done, and soon it will be helpful in teaching. It's an escape sometimes.
However.....on the negative side...I am on the internet too much. It doesn't help that all of my school work has been on the computer - all research done on the computer, everything typed, all of our assignments online, a lot of readings online. Besides that, I get on too much. I get on for too long. I use it to procrastinate when I should be working. I get OCD with things online, like trying to find something, or checking facebook or e-mail, or trying to win the top spot in Bejewelled Blitz. Or other random things that suck me in, like watching countless youtube videos. There's an application on facebook called, "Visual Bookshelf" and since I love to read I loved this application. Still do. But, one day I went on and found every book I could think of that I've ever read, and rated it with stars, and put some comments on them. It took much too long.
Facebook in particular is a big stumbling block for me. Laugh if you will, but I've come across a LOT of other people of all different ages who admit to the same thing once I bring it up. Sometimes it becomes a source of jealousy. I see people's lives on facebook who have a great marraige, great kids, etc. and are where I want to be in life and are not. I see people who I want to hang out with and can hardly get them to call me back, yet they go hang out with other people all the time. It becomes a source of selfishness. I want people to see what I do and like me. Sometimes without realizing it, it's me braging about myself and wanting people to be proud of me and think highly of me. It becomes a source of wasting time. I get on and can't get off, making me go to bed late which makes me tired the next day. Or I'll be on there instead of doing a quiet time. Sometimes I'd be on there for too long and it would require me to not get my homework done, or to rush through my school work instead of doing it with enough time and to the fullest. It pulls me from doing other things like laundry, cleaning my room, reading books, and exercizing. It dulls relationships. I rely on that to keep up with people in such an impersonal way instead of through calling them, writing them a letter, seeing them in person. Facebook is an inacurate view of someone's life. Some people only put up the good stuff.
Someone once asked me, "If you spend 4 hours in a row on the computer, would you feel bad?" "Yeah." "But if you spent 4 hours in a row reading a book would you feel bad?" "No." "Why?" I had to think about it. Partly because I think that reading is just good for your brain. If it's a nonfiction book it could be helpful for you life, your personality, your job, you walk with God. If it's a fiction book, it's still just good to read. But to be on the computer for that long....it just seems like I could be doing something better with my time.
So there it is again. One of my biggest strengths is my biggest weakness.
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