Time

Do you know how precious time is? The words that come to mind when I think of most people and how they use their time: lazy, wasteful, hesitant, waiting, haphazardly, without care. And when I say most people I am including myself. When I had homework to do, I was aware of my wasteful time on facebook, the internet, too many naps, etc. Since I haven't had homework, my free time has had no demands, and I have seen a lack in my ability to get things done. In a ridiculous sense of things. I have not cleaned my room in I don't know how long. It's so crazy that there's a section of my room I can't walk in - stuff blocks my way to the closet so I just haven't worn any of those clothes. I pile up papers and mail on my dresser, my desk, and my chair that goes to my desk. I don't fold my clean laundry - it sits in my basket - and the dirty clothes on the floor. I didn't put my calendar up until yesterday and I've had it since November, so I missed the whole month of January. Why? Because I didn't feel like going in and writing the birthdays from the previous year. Still haven't - it's a blank calendar hanging on the wall. I painted two pictures two weeks ago that I want to hang on my wall - they're propped up against the wall on the floor behind my door next to my laundry basket.....in such a way that I can't open my door very far when I go in or out.

I told my friend Joy yesterday - it doesn't matter if I teach right now, I have 60 years to teach. She grinned and replied, "You're not promised tomorrow." I don't live that way. I live as if I will die when I am 100. Ok, hopefully 85ish because I don't want to live to 100! Oh hey - I want to go back to Disney World and Islands of Adventre... soon. And I want to visit my extended family... soon. I want to go on a cruise... after I get married. I want to go on mission trips around the world - ooh, I am this summer, so that's good! Besides our goals and chores we should stop procrastinating on, there's something more important, more time pressing - furthering God's kingdom. Because while I may have 80 years left of my life, someone else that I know might die tomorrow. Not a Christian. And if it was me... then what would God say to me when I stand before Him about how I spent my time?

While we aren't killed in America for being a Christian like other countries are, we are killed spiritually by distractions, massive amount of time spent at work, sucess, entertainment, etc. We are thrown into the idea that we should make ourselves happy, along with our friends and family. Not a bad thing in itself, but not the only or main goal that should be in our lives.

I just finished watching the movie, "Courageous," and in the movie a 9 year old girl dies and the parents regret not spending enough time with her. A man goes to jail for stealing drugs and realizes he let his family down and is going to be in prison for a long time - his time is gone.

An awareness of this is one thing, but an action to break this cycle is another. It's evaluating your time, cutting back on wasteful things, but also adding the correct things. I sometimes try to take breaks from facebook, but then end up on pinterest as much as I would have been on facebook. Or try to take a break from the internet and end up playing a computer game for a ridiculous amount of time. If I don't get on the computer, thinking it would save me time, I then find something else silly to fill that time. What a frustrating cycle. Self-discipline is incredibly hard. To break that laziness is hard.

Tick, tock. Watch the clock - don't wait til you have something bad happen before you make good decisions with your time. Same for myself.