The good things as of lately

My mission trip to South Dakota is in 5 weeks (and 2 days)! I've been helping plan it the last few weeks, and it's exciting. I'm excited to go to a new place, take pictures, go with people that I love as well as new people, and most of all, to share the love of Jesus with more people. 

I have a new "job" - eight to ten hours a week I'm helping with admin stuff at my church. This sounds minor, but to me it's a major because:

-that means only 4 days at Starbucks instead of 5

-I like meetings and planning and that's what I'm doing! 

-I finally have a good reason to use OneNote

-I'm working with awesome people 

-It's nice actually liking what I do for a job instead of working because I have to 

In two weeks, our small groups at church are starting! And to start off with I'm going to two. :-) Because I like the people in both, and just am not sure which one I'm going to stay in yet. But I'm looking forward to being in a bible study again. 

Books are just awesome. I love reading. It makes the boring days good. 

I've been enjoying time with friends. Make new friends, but keep the old, one is silver and the other's gold. 

Is this the last time?

Sometimes you know when the last time you do something is. And sometimes there’s no way of knowing. Valentine’s Day was this past week, and I’ve never really been one of those “I’m so mad I’m single on Valentine’s Day” because it’s simply a day. But I did wonder… What if this was my last Valentine’s Day being single? Because in the course of a year, a lot can happen. Not saying I would be married this time next year, but someday will be my last Valentine’s Day being single, and I won’t have even known it until the next year. Same for anything really. Like what if this year I had a boyfriend and got engaged, and didn’t know that this past Christmas was my last one at my current church? What if last year’s trip to Kenya was the last one I went to single, since I’m not sure what year I’m going back again, and I didn’t know it? Honestly it crossed my mind while I was there. But of course, there’s no way to know.

Or maybe I’ll get a new job this year, and December was the last insane December at Starbucks. And I won’t have known it.

It’s hard to imagine those things because of the 6 years I’ve been at Starbucks and the 30 years (in May) that I’ve been single… not that my first 13 years really counted as being single, hahaha… and so the concept of those things changing don’t really compute well in my brain. They both sound as far away as retiring, or dying of old age. These people who say that life is short or that time flies, I’m not sure what they’re doing to make them think that. I feel like it’s the movie Ground Hog Day a lot of times.

Don’t get me wrong – right now in my life I am happy with a lot of things! Church is good, we’re about to start small groups, I always enjoy taking pictures, I love getting together with friends, my new boss is great, I’m excited about going on a mission trip to South Dakota in a few weeks, I’m planning some other trips for this year, and more. I’m trying to enjoy this “season” of my life and “make the most of where I’m planted.” Insert all the cliché quotes here. But the underlying desires don’t simply go away. They just sit underneath it all.

It's weird when you know your perspective is off, but you keep getting it pulled into focus in your life anyways.

I have a lot of great things in my life! But the things that walk center stage for 8 hours of my day are things that are annoying, things that make me angry, etc. It's often repetitive, out of my control, and if I try to talk to someone about it, they don't care or don't remember. It doesn't help that most of my coworkers get caught up in complaining too.

-People leave the pitcher rinser running, so it's the sound of constant loud running water. Not only does the sound get on my nerves, but sometimes it makes me not be able to hear customers well.
-Someone putting clean dishes back out so we get it dirty again before the night is over
-People who say the same exact same phrase or sentence to every customer. In response to "how are you?" "Oh hanging in there!" "Can't complain! No one would care if I did!" "I'm tired but I gotta be here."
-Putting dirty dishes in the soap water before rinsing them off (or just leaving them on the side for someone else to do) which makes the water immediately brown with coffee, mocha, etc.
-Some people are just really bad at drivethru and everybody gets confused, they ask unnecessary questions and confuse the customer, etc.
-We're supposed to have under 50 seconds per car at the window from open 7:00 AM - 11:00 AM, so some people get extremely stressed, get angry, ask why a person is still at the window when you have no control over it, ask them to pull up so we can take stuff out to them but there aren't always enough people to do that and then it throws us all off
-People who try to finish a drink that I'm still holding IN MY HAND as if they were being helpful
-Someone leaving a drink half finished and walking off and forgetting about it
-People not making whip creams or filling up half and half carafes, so then when we need them we're rushing to do it because we need it RIGHT THEN
-Someone making loud breathing noises into the headset, weird popping sounds, and pushing the mic to their mouth too far and being WAY louder and hurting my ears, even when ask them to stop
-People doing other things off the floor and then not coming to help us when we get slammed
-Customers who say frappe or frapp instead of Frappuccino
-Customers who add a million things at the window and hold up the line instead of ordering at the box like a normal person

This list never ends. And some people I work with are amazingly annoying, like I didn't know I could be that annoyed with a person until I worked at SB.

I don't want to be so frustrated with all of these things. They are minor in the grand scheme of things. Some of them are really petty and small. Sometimes I try to constantly think about other things at work. The good things. Things at church, things coming up that I'm looking forward to, good books I'm reading, etc. Sometimes that does great! Other times it doesn't. Sometimes I try to pray all day. That works when I am mostly cleaning and doing dishes, but not at all when I'm making drinks and ringing people up because that requires my full attention. But overall, it's just draining. I feel stuck in it. I can't get out. I see no end to it.